„How to separate us when grandkids have both Ukrainian and Russian blood?”

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Nikolay Garagan is a Truck Driver in United State and is from Everett, WA. He was born in Pavlograd, Dnepropetrovsk region, affected by the Russian invasion. He thinks the war in Ukraine is a tragedy that affects first of all Ukrainians but it also affects everyone in the world, and especially us, the Ex-Soviets.

Many of us can read and listen to the news in Ukrainian language without translation, and we can talk to people in our community without a translator too. So that’s exactly what we, the Romanian community, are doing right now. We are reaching out to our Ukrainian neighbors in the US to get their story and find out how are they dealing with this war on a personal level.

How did you get the news about the war in Ukraine? 

Nikolay Garagan: Honestly, we suspected this could happen one day, considering all previous Putin’s actions, but when it happened, we just couldn’t believe that Russia could declare full-fledged war and invade Ukraine like this. We, as residents of Dnepropetrovsk, always talked with a mixture of Russian and Ukrainian languages. Everyone, Russians and Ukrainians, understood each other. So, every time we would hear that someone is oppressing Russian speakers in Ukraine, we would get very upset, because that was just not true. Nothing like that happened, ever.

But when Putin appropriated Crimea, we started thinking what was going to be next. We started looking at the historic precedents of our fathers, analysis and predictions, saw all these separatists’ movements in Donetsk and Lugansk in Eastern Ukraine, and started making preparations. 

Immediately after Crimean invasion, we from our side (in the US) gathered together and started sending to Ukraine all we could find: shoes, military clothes, vests, tank overalls, we send a lot of stuff so people could protect Ukraine in case of a war. There were many of us donating to Ukraine. 

Family relatives from Ukraine just before the war in Ukraine

But now everything happened so suddenly. Putin kept saying that he will invade. However, the world split into two: for those who were certain there was going to be war, and the other side who couldn’t believe that such war was possible. If you look at Ukraine’s regions like Poltava, Cherkassy, all that region is a mesh of Russians and Ukrainians in almost every family. It’s very common for the husband to be Russian, and the wife to be Ukrainian, Russian grandkids could have a Ukrainian grandpa. And on the Russian side in Kursk, Briansk, Rostov-on-Don, Krasnodar regions, it’s the same thing. We are all meshed. There is no logic to explain this invasion. How could you come to Ukraine and kill Russians who lived in Ukraine in peace?

My son is Ukrainian, he’s married to a Russian woman. My son-in-law is from Krasnodar in Russia, and my daughter is from Dnepropetrovsk in Ukraine. How can you separate us when my grandkids have both: Ukrainian and Russian blood?

Do you have relatives in Ukraine right now?

Nikolay Garagan: Of course. My wife is from a family of nine. We moved to America but they all stayed in Ukraine. I have relatives all over Ukraine: in Pavlograd and throughout Dnepropetrovsk region, in Dimitrovo in Donets region (Eastern Ukraine), in Lutsk, in Kyiv, Lviv, Kramatorsk, everywhere. We have four nieces in Kyiv. A couple with small children was lucky enough to hop in the car and get out just in time. Others are still in Kyiv under the rubbles from bombardments. From some of them we haven’t heard yet. We are hoping to get in touch with them eventually, when it all calms down. 

For our relatives in Kyiv, it will be their second displacement. They are from Donetsk originally, and after the war in Donbass started in 2014, they moved to Kyiv. They found jobs, and did very well for themselves because they are very entrepreneurial. They just got out of their refugee status. They borrowed money to buy themselves houses and now a war started. And they have to drop off everything and run.

My nephew has three kids. He was helped by a Christian organization to evacuate to Poland. Poland is helping many Ukrainians who have large families. Germany and Israel are also helping our community. Israeli doctors came to Ukraine with an entire mobile medical train. Georgians are also arriving, not sure if they provide humanitarian aid or came to fight. But it looks like all countries are fighting together this demonic monster – Putin. We all can’t wait until this monster is dead.

How are you coping with it, worrying every day if your relatives are alive or dead?

Nikolay Garagan: Luckily, my relatives are fine, so far. Every morning we say a prayer for Ukraine, and we call each other. My wife created a group chat on Viber for family members, so every morning they either send a text or leave a voicemail that they are fine. Or they let us know if they moved from one place to another, so we know where they are. We keep in touch. We wanted to send them some money but all the banks are closed. We sent some produce to Lviv because my mom is from there and I have a lot of nephews there but now that parcel is stuck in Lviv. It’s impossible for that to get to Kyiv because Kyiv is under intense fire.  

I pray for my aunt in Pavlodar. She’s 80, and she’s paralyzed, so she can’t evacuate but even if she manages to get out of the house, the stores are all closed. So, for four days she stays in her home without food and just boils water and drinks it to stop the hunger. My acquaintance from Kramatorsk told me the Russians are pure evil because they bombed a maternity ward, a day care, basically everything in their way. It’s chaotic. There are no military objects there, it’s all civilians and they are hit with Grad missile, they are being shoot from left to right.  

What message do you have for Ukrainians, Russians and Americans?

Family members who are currently hiding in Ukrainian basements

Nikolay Garagan: We personally don’t need help. But Ukrainians in Ukraine need military help. For Russians soldiers, I will cite Putin’s words who said that they all will go to Paradise. We wish them to get there sooner, so they can leave us and our land alone. For Ukrainians, I wish for all this nightmare to end, and for the world to come together to stop this madness and this tyrant. Let God light a candle for Putin, so he can die sooner for all of this to end. 

I am very sorry for Russian people, and for Ukrainian people who die on both sides, because Putin doesn’t realize what curse he brought upon Russia, so to speak. 

We have relatives from Russia, whose kids are going to school here in US and their children are being bullied at school: “Ah, you are from Russia. Then it’s your fault.”  The kids are not to blame, and their parents are not to blame for this war. But the kids who were born here, and maybe never have been to Russia, are now suffering. It’s very unpleasant. 

I don’t know who else to do personally. I can’t go to fight there, because I’m an American citizen, and I don’t want to break US laws. Besides I have a family: children and grandkids. But I will support Ukraine in any way I can.

Irina VanPatten

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